WHAT THE HELL

Kevin Brennan Writes About What It's Like

The perils of Googling yourself

sad_monkey
One thing I’ve learned: you’ll always regret Googling yourself and looking at the Images page.

I was killing time yesterday waiting for an electrician to show up, so I thought I’d see where I fit in the constellation of Kevin Brennans out there. I already knew that there are millions of us, but, considering my massive online presence these days I wondered if I had clawed my way toward the top of the page.

No such luck.

Actually, there aren’t millions of us, but in the U.S., at any rate, 192 other people share my name, according to HowManyOfMe.com. (Plug your name in and enjoy the hilarity yourself.) Thanks to Google, I’m aware of a number of Kevin Brennans in other countries too, including, obviously, Ireland.

On the Google Images page, my photo doesn’t appear till the eighteenth row, and it’s unfortunately right next to CIA Director John O. Brennan. At least the cover of Occasional Soulmates shows up on the eleventh row.

There’s an inexplicable picture of Barney Fife in there somewhere, as well as a link to this guy’s Twitter page. He sure makes me proud to be a Kevin Brennan. There’s also a picture of a monkey, Alex Trebek, a number of dogs, a couple of nuns, and a package of Quorn microwave mince. I don’t know what to make of it.

The most disturbing picture, though, was of a guy who looks a lot like my younger brother. When I clicked on it, I got the shock of my life: “It was with deep regret late on Thursday night… that we learnt of the very sad passing of Kevin Brennan.”

I hugged my wife as soon as she came home. I would have hugged the dog before that, but he was with my wife.

I refrained from hugging the electrician.

Anyway, when you Google yourself, go in expecting surprises.

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14 comments on “The perils of Googling yourself

  1. sknicholls
    January 9, 2015

    If it’s any consolation, when I google S.K. Nicholls a copy of Yesterday Road and Occasional Soulmates shows up. 🙂

  2. Dylan Hearn
    January 9, 2015

    “I would have hugged the dog before that, but he was with my wife.”

    Kevin Brennan, take a bow. That was a great one-liner.

    • Kevin Brennan
      January 9, 2015

      How ’bout if I take a bow-wow?

      (Couldn’t resist…)

  3. donaldbakerauthor
    January 9, 2015

    This is all that came lup for me.

  4. John W. Howell
    January 9, 2015

    This is something I do all the time. To mix it up, I change the name.

  5. kingmidget
    January 9, 2015

    I’d be willing to bet Barney Fife shows up in everybody’s Google search. I don’t know how many rows down this one was, but this is my favorite from a Google Images search on my name.

    Well, wait, maybe my favorite is this one …

    Well, now see what you’ve done, I’m about to get myself into trouble.

    • Kevin Brennan
      January 10, 2015

      Does Google Images have access to our browsing history? Holy crap! 😖

      • kingmidget
        January 10, 2015

        At least for the second picture, the model shares my last name.

  6. cinthiaritchie
    January 22, 2015

    Too funny! Love that microwave mince showed up in your name search (I’m not even sure what mince is). Now I’m going to have to go and Google myself. Cheers and hug the dog, okay?

    • Kevin Brennan
      January 22, 2015

      Good luck in your Googling. Sometimes I think we’re in a reality vortex that exists just to fuck with our brains!

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This entry was posted on January 9, 2015 by in Et alia and tagged .
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