Kevin Brennan Writes About What It's Like
Speaking of the new world we’re living in, i.e., TrumpWorld®, I learned the other day that some liberal friends of ours are being harassed by a marauding Trumpster who must have been affronted this fall by their hand-painted “Never Trump!” sign. Before the election, the sign mysteriously disappeared. We’re guessing this guy threw up every time he drove by their house on his way to his bunker.
Now, though, he yells obscenities when he drives by. Our friends tried to dash out and see who he was, maybe get a license plate number, but he had the tailgate of his truck down and the plate was obscured. What a smart yahoo.
I have a prime suspect in mind. A little farther along the road lives a feller who flies the flag of the State of Jefferson. Ever hear of it?
Supporters of the State of Jefferson want the northern rural counties to secede from California, joined by the red parts of Oregon and Washington. They’re tired of paying taxes to support illegal immigrants and other people who don’t want to work for a livin’ (such as many of their own adult children, I hate to bring up). Except that illegal immigrants do work for a living and work extremely hard, from what I’ve seen. Anyway, once the State of Jefferson secedes, it’s pretty much every man for himself in that warm and fuzzy “Don’t tread on me” kind of way. The new state’s revenues will come from timber and mineral rights instead of taxes. Good luck with that.
Interestingly, the counties that make up the proposed State of Jefferson are paradises of unemployment, welfare, low education, net population loss, and lower than average home values. You can only imagine how much better off they’d be if government got off their backs.
At least they’re imagining it.
Along with the State of Jefferson flag, my suspect also has an SoJ seal on his truck door. I told our friends to look for it next time. The truck matches the description of the drive-by yeller’s.
I think the seal of the State of Jefferson looks like a dead emoji, but that could be my liberal imagination talking.
Here’s what I love about TrumpWorld®. This guy won, but he’s still so goddamn full of self-righteous fury that he can’t abide anyone who disagrees with his political wet dream. I have no doubt that he also owns at least two dozen guns, so I can understand our friends’ anxiety. They know precisely the kind of person they’re dealing with. If they get too uppity, he might have to blast out some windows one night.
I’ll confess to wanting to scrawl “pussy grabber” on all the Trump signs I encountered in the neighborhood. I wanted to but never did. But one thing that distinguishes us from raging Trump voters is that I wouldn’t be driving by their houses if Hillary had won, shouting “Mother-effing conservatives!”
The last thing I’d want to do is scare these people any more than they already are.